Donna Marie Darner

Donna Marie Darner, age 79, of rural Lane, Kansas, passed away May 2, 2024.

Family will meet with friends for Donna’s visitation on Friday May 10, 2024, from 5 pm to 8 pm, Eddy Birchard Funeral Home, 203 Main, Osawatomie, Kansas, 66064. Her funeral will be held at 1:00 pm on Saturday May 11, 2024 at Osawatomie High School Auditorium, 1200 Trojan Drive, Osawatomie, Kansas, 66064.  Burial will be held at the Osawatomie Cemetery immediately following.

Donna Marie Smith Darner was born on August 2, 1944, at 727 Lincoln Street, Osawatomie Kansas.  Donna is the daughter of David Walter and Wanda Maxine (Bennett) Smith.  Donna spent her entire life dedicated to the Osawatomie Kansas Community.

Donna was united in marriage to Kenneth Darner on October 14, 1967 at Donna’s parents’ home in Osawatomie.  They became the parents of two daughters, Holly Lynn and Kendra Denise.  They resided on their farm together at rural Lane for 45 years until Kenneth’s passing in 2021.

Mom remained on the farm that her and our father built together until her passing.  Mom was adamant about remaining at her home as it was a reminder of her family and the hard work that her and our father did together.  Their home has been a sanctuary for our entire family, where her children, but especially her grandchildren, could go to get away from their parents, get special love, and advice from her and our dad.  The holiday of Christmas was Mom’s favorite holiday where grandchildren would come and spend the night and open gifts by the fireplace every year.  Mom would always insist on being the last to open her gifts as she enjoyed watching her family and the joy that each gift brought to her children, but especially her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

Donna began working at the Osawatomie State Hospital in 1960 in the dietary department while attending high school, under the direction of her mother Wanda Smith, who was the supervisor.  After completing her high school education, Donna transferred to the nursing department and started training to become a Mental Health Aide and then a Licensed Mental Health Technician.  Donna was approved by the Osawatomie State Hospital in 1981, to attend nurse’s training on the Timed-Release Program.  This was a new program initiated by the hospital to facilitate the training of Registered Nurses due the nursing shortage. The requirements were stringent, consisting of having been employed at the hospital for at least one year, having completed at least the Mental Health Aide class, maintaining a very good evaluation, having all the prerequisites completed and be accepted at an approved school of nursing.  Mom met all these requirements and began nurse’s training in the fall semester of 1981.

Donna graduated in May of 1983 from Fort Scott Community College with an associate degree in nursing.  She began working as a unit nurse in direct patient care immediately following graduation.

Donna returned to college to obtain her Bachelor of Science in Nursing in 1988 and graduated from Pittsburg State University in 1990.  Donna then returned to Pittsburg State University in 1996 and received her master’s degree in Technical Teaching Education in 1999 with honors.  She was a member of the Sigma Theta Tau International Gamma Upsilon honor society of nursing.

During her 55 years at the Osawatomie State Hospital, Mom cherished and put her patients care first.  Mom had high expectations of her nurses and staff.  It has been said that if you did your job and took care of the patients, then Mom was satisfied with your work.  If you did not follow her patient care expectations, then she would make sure to discuss what expectations she had so that care of the patients was to her expectations and appropriate.

Mom had high expectations for her children as well. She also taught us many lessons about dealing with people, problem solving situations, and believing in your abilities when helping others. She exhibited dedication to her job and genuinely enjoyed going to work each day. This was instilled in us from a very young age, and it is no wonder that her daughters have followed in her footsteps.

During the time that she was going to school and working full time, Mom was ever present in the activities of her family.  Mom was involved with events for her children and grandchildren.  Mom was a sponsor for Calling All Girls and was a softball coach for both her daughters in the summers as they were growing up.  She would be seen at her grandchildren’s programs with gifts of flowers and admiration.  She would take any opportunity to share the pride she had for her family and the love she had for them.  Mom was also present for all the births of her grandchildren.

Our mother was the glue that held our family together.  Our father always told us that she was the best thing that could have ever happened to him.  Mom was a nurse and took care of both Holly and Kendra when medical issues were life threatening.  She was always by our side telling us what to do to make ourselves better, even though at times, it was the hardest thing for us to do.

Mom never let her children or grandchildren want or need for anything.  She was the first to make sure that their needs were met and often gave gifts of assistance for their care or whatever the case may have been.

Mom welcomed new people into the family and was always asking lots of questions to get to know the new person in her life.  She was quick to figure out how she could help them and developed a bond with those that she loved.

Mom has always been independent, and she has always made her own decisions.  Mom liked to be in charge and has passed this trait to her daughters.  If she did not get what she wanted, right away, she would figure out a way or find someone to make sure it was done the way she saw fit.  This continued until her last days, insisting on staying home and directing her family until closing the final chapter of her life.  If you ask her son in laws, they will tell you that their wives act the same way as their mother.  The saying, “When I open up my mouth, sometimes my mother comes out” has and continues to occur to this day.

During her employment at the Osawatomie State Hospital, she has held many leadership and supervisory positions including section nurse for four patient units, Program Director for four patient units, and Director of Nursing when she retired in 2013.

Donna has always been a very strong advocate for the mentally ill and others with disabilities.  She served as DPOA for a person with mental illness that resided at Medical Lodge in Paola, Kansas.  She would visit her person monthly and received several calls from her person and staff as she advocated for her persons needs.  She assisted her person to obtain the treatment that was needed and the assistance that Mom provided prevented her person to return to the hospital.  Mom could always be found surrounded by patients at Medial Lodge as she would always make sure to have change in hand to get anyone that asked a pop as a special treat. Mom would also bring patients to our home and cook them a home cooked meal with our family.  Mom always knew the importance of having someone to love you and she ensured that the patients that she cared for were loved as a part of our family.

Mom was a guardian through the Kansas Guardianship Program for several patients in different locations across the state of Kansas.  She would travel to visit them, to check on their needs, and ensure that on special days of birthdays or holidays, the people she cared for had a special gift.  It was not uncommon for patients to call for support, to ask for advice in difficult times, and request various items that they could not afford themselves.  Mom took great pride in making sure that she provided the support and friendship to those individuals that did not have active family involvement. Mom would make sure that whatever they needed was addressed and delivered in a timely manner.  Mom never gave up on her belief that her patients could get better. She always treated them with respect and taught them lessons. This mutual understanding of trust was built with those she cared for and patients looked to her as a role model to help in the improvement of their lives.  Due to her dedication for the patients that she served both at the Osawatomie State Hospital and the various communities, Mom was recognized two years in a row for Psychiatric Nurse of the Year.

Mom was a very active member of the Kansas State Nurses Association (KSNA) consistently since becoming a Registered Nurse in 1983 with her efforts to keep her district active.  She attended and participated in the Nurses Day at the Legislature (NDATL) and the nursing conventions regularly.  Mom gave presentations for the conventions on Leadership in Mental Health Nursing.

Mom held several offices in the KSNA District #9 including President and board member.  She was the district Legislature Representative for several years and was very involved with legislative issues related to KSNA and the Osawatomie State Hospital.  She was in close contact with Senator Pat Apple, Representative Jene Vickrey, Senator Molly Baumgardner, Representative Bill Feuerborn and Representative Lynn Jenkins.  Mom was also active in organizing town hall meetings for legislative and community involvement events.

Mom was recognized for her 40 years of service at the capital in Topeka by Governor Bill Graves.  She is currently the longest state employee on record serving 55 years at Osawatomie State Hospital.  A dedication for her years of service was held at the Osawatomie State Hospital in November of 2023.  A years of service wall has been established that will not only recognize her work at the hospital, but also other long-term employees.  This wall is a tribute to those that have dedicated their lives to the Osawatomie State Hospital and the patients they have served.

The one thing that our Mom was most proud of was graduating from Osawatomie High School with the class of 1962.  She was an active member of the Osawatomie Alumni board from 2005-2022.  She also served as president of the Osawatomie Alumni Association from 2008-2022.  She loved spending time with her classmates and looked forward to seeing them year after year.

Mom also served on the Republican Women’s Committee for over eight years, served on the Miami County Republican Central Committee as secretary, Osawatomie Chamber of Commerce (member for over 35years) Board President, past president of the Miami County Health board for over six years, ECKAN Board Member for East Central Kansas (appointed by the county commissioner), Republican Committee Woman for Miami County,( Mound Township), Clerk for Miami County Mound Township, board member for the Miami County Historical Museum, a member of the Red Hat Society, Osawatomie Rebekah Lodge #336 IOOF, and Friends of the Mentally Ill Foundation.

Mom was a fan of oldtime country music. She was a member of the Kansas Oldtime Fiddlers, Pickers, and Singers organization.  Her father had her singing at a young age with a cowboy hat and six guns on her side.  She sang the old favorites of Little Jimmy Dickens, “Take An Old Cold, Tater and Wait”, and “A Sleepin’ at the Foot of the Bed.” Her father started the Osawatomie Chapter of the Kansas Oldtime Fiddlers, Pickers, and Singers and her mother was the secretary of the organization for many years. Her love of music was passed down to her grandchildren who also performed at the state conventions where trophies were won, laughter abounded, and dancing ensued.  If she thought you could sing, she would be relentless at times until you sang a song to her.  She would then tell you that you should continue singing as it was something that had helped her in her life.

Donna was preceded in death by her parents, sister Evelyn Gabbert, two sons Kevin Ray Daner and Kenneth Allen Darner and granddaughter Savanah Sickler.

Survivors include:  three daughters Holly (Kevin) Kastler, Kendra (Jason) Brewer, and Debra Darner; Grandchildren Kevin Lloyd Darner, Raymond Darner, Kevin Ray Darner Jr., Christopher Darner, Micheal Fortmeyer Jr, Jeremy Fortmeyer, Damion Fortmeyer, Tanner Foulk (Nikki), Kaitlin Cook (James), Jacilynn Brewer (Austin Sharp), Gavin Brewer, Gage Sickler (Emily Best), Eric Kastler and Adam Kastler;  great grandchildren  Nora Foulk, Montgomery June Foulk, Hudson Gray, E.J. Gamache, Adalyn Scheckel, Gregory Cook, Olivia Cook,  Paige Fortmeyer, Darion Fortmeyer, Michael “Treu” Fortmeyer III, and King Fortmeyer; brother David Walter Smith, Jr. (Janice), brother-in-law Mike Gabbert, numerous great-great grandchildren; many other relatives and a host of friends.

God provides special gifts when in hard times and in need.  Our family was blessed to have Alisha Stephens be a part of our life and be mom’s caretaker.  As you might expect, Mom welcomed her into her home with love and a hug. Alisha went above and beyond for our mother, treating her with love and compassion.  She was dedicated to our mom and to her needs as well as to ours. Alisha, our families will always be grateful to you and know that our love for you is unconditional.

A special thank you to the staff of Good Shepard Hospice, Garnett.  Thank you, Leslie, for always making sure to come when we needed you, texting and calling back when we were in need of advice and preparing us in a comforting way for the exceptional care of our mom.

Enriching lives one person at a time is the theme of the Friends of the Mentally Ill Foundation of Osawatomie, Kansas.  Contributions can be sent to Eddy Birchard Funeral Home P.O. Box 430, Osawatomie, KS, 66064, to the memorial Fund in Donna’s name.  Family and friends are encouraged to post their condolences and memories on the guest book at Eddy Birchard Funeral Home.

A dinner will be held at the Darner Farm, 39413 W 387th St, Lane, KS, 66042, after the service. Please bring your favorite dish, lawn chairs and your love for our mom to celebrate her life with us.

Mom was an avid Kansas City Chiefs, Kansas Jayhawk and Osawatomie Trojan Fan.  We encourage you to wear her favorite attire.